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By Jan Udlock on January 20, 2011
A dear friend suggested to me yesterday that I should think about blogging for fun. I was blogging for fun…
until I actually thought about it.
For fun would be “just doing it”…Not worrying about what people thought…Not looking at my stats…etc. Not obsessing over the fact that I don’t any comments…
Ouch.
Maybe I wasn’t doing it for fun. I was trying to be successful which there is nothing wrong with. But what’s my focus? And what is successful?
Hmmmm….
maybe I just need to have fun with my blog as I learn wordpress. What would it look like if I tried new things in my class and not worried about mastering them? Maybe I just should relax and make a lot of mistakes and laugh about them! Isn’t it hard to look foolish or feel foolish but I’m not so sure others are actually looking or caring about it…
We need to give ourselves a break and just breathe and be in the moment.
What are you struggling with to be good at? Where’s your focus? Are you taking deep breaths?
Make mistakes today and show your kids, it’s okay. Have fun and laugh…
a few…more…times,
Posted in Blogging, Family, Imperfection |
By Jan Udlock on January 19, 2011
I know I shouldn’t be writing this when I’ve had too much coffee but I’m back home. I’m currently enrolled in a blogging class and I’m so excited to start back blogging.
In the past months when I’ve been gone, I’ve read hundreds of blog posts and have come to see one of the things that I need more of is pictures. Pictures do say 1,000 words. They can be encouraging, heart-warming, startling or mysterious.
I’ll be working on my homework with my blog so it may morph into an unknown creature. But I hope to produce a blog that encourages your heart as a mom and as a person.
Please come back again. Leave me comments on what you’d like me to talk about. In the future, I’ll have a giveaway, too. Thanks for stopping by…
Posted in Blogging, Encouragement, Imperfection, Parenting |
By Jan Udlock on August 26, 2010
Are you concerned about one of your kids? Sometimes I worry about a certain character trait in one of my kids or a behavior issue in another. Recently I was reminded about the farmer and his level of patience he needs to produce a crop. He doesn’t grow anything overnight and what he does grow takes good soil, watering and a lot of sunshine. He has to be patient.
With school starting again, there will be a handful of transitions for your kids and mine. Parents have to get back to a schedule and a rhythm. With transitions, there also can be anxiety among you and your kids. And my tribe is no exception. Already there is a lot of anxiety in my head because I want schedules to fall back into place smoothly without fights about going to bed earlier, lost pencils and homework and sibling wars. Yet, that’s asking too much, too soon. How can I make it easier on them and on myself?
So I’m reminded to be patient with my kids. I need to remember when I see hyped-up emotions, I want to be quieter and calmer. In the past, when they got louder, I got louder and clamped down on them harder. Trust me that does not work.
Join me in extending grace to our kids with the new school year. I hope to listen more and watch out for my lectures. My plan is to listen to their complaints and yet offer ways for them to not be a victim. When I start feeling the anxiety about their behavior, I’m going to think about that patient farmer.
Note to self: Change my laptop’s desktop to an oak tree because that’s what’s growing at my house.
Photo courtesy of Bruce Tuten (Creative Commons)
Posted in Family, Imperfection, Parenting |
By Jan Udlock on August 19, 2010
When life slows down for a few minutes here and there, I ponder my kids and my parenting. When I was a very young mom, I thought I could “mold” my kids into perfect children. Well, almost twenty two years later I laugh about this lie that I believed. I also think about what I did well and my past mistakes in parenting. Will it make a difference in their lives?
Through good friends and their wisdom, lately I’ve been coming to terms with accepting my past mistakes. I now realize that I did the best I could at the time. I had never parented that age child under those circumstances, and I did what I thought was right. Would I do something different today? Probably but…I now know what I would have done today because of what I learned from my mistakes of the past. I want to acknowledge what happened and move on.
When we hold on to shame, it corrupts our relationships with ourself and others. I want to accept my past behavior and acknowledge it but I don’t want to believe shame’s lie. I want to live in today and help my kids do the same.
I know today’s post is rather heavy but sometimes if we can look at this kind stuff in our lives, it will make our tomorrow lighter. Can you relate?
Photo courtesy of Tanakawho (Creative Commons)
Posted in Family, Parenting |
By Jan Udlock on August 9, 2010
As moms, often we aren’t good at taking care of ourselves. We always put our kids ahead of our needs which is normal when they are young and helpless. Yet, our kids seem to grow up, and we still forget to take care of our self.
This weekend, I got back from the Willamette Writer’s Conference and had an encouraging time. After the first day, I walked away realizing that I’m doing the right things for my writing career: not perfectly, but I’m doing them. Having a writer’s group, a writer buddy, blogging, taking classes and writing (oh yeah, that too.) is a great mix to future success.
I’ve also just added joining Willamette Writers’ Association to the plan. My goal is to attend their monthly meetings when my schedule permits. I love my online writer buds but I now see how important it is for me to see and talk to a real live human about the ups and downs of the writing life.
We all need encouragement in our daily lives as mamas but it’s also our responsibility to seek it out. How are you doing that today?
Photo courtesy of karindalziel (Creative Commons)
Posted in Blogging, Encouragement, Writing |
By Jan Udlock on July 27, 2010
When I started the blog, I purposely didn’t write about my faith because as I shared before, it’s going through a metamorphosis. For a while it was easy to sit back and rely on the verses I knew and rely on my small theology but I felt like a fake. I’m so worried about doing rather than being.
And I still can’t describe to my satisfaction what my faith is to me or maybe even better, I can’t describe what I mean to my God. Yet, I know I am precious to Him. Today I was once again struck by the fact that we are referred to as His sheep. Now many would rebel and scream “why such a lowly animal?” But truly, I understand.
Sheep aren’t particularly bright. They follow each other. They are needy creatures, and they need a Shepherd. The list goes on and on.
I am thankful for the reminder because it affirms the feelings of neediness in my life. It gives me permission to let go and just be. He waits for me. I can’t fix it. And He waits. I’m trying. He waits. And then I surrender, and He is there.
Photo courtesy of David Masters (Creative Commons)
Posted in Blogging, Faith, Imperfection |
By Jan Udlock on July 27, 2010
Yesterday my two youngest daughters wrote up a schedule from 11 AM – 6 PM. Brainstormed ideas filled in the slots. Their day consisted of quiet reading, art, exercise, lunch, play an inside game, dance, a spy game, outside water games, painting toenails, computer time and dinner.
There was no fighting. It was very quiet around the house. I did NOT have to tell them to get off the computer. What a treat!
Can we have schedule tomorrow? Maybe mom needs a schedule?
Photo courtesy of alancleaver_2000 (Creative Commons)
Posted in Creativity, Family, Parenting |
By Jan Udlock on July 26, 2010
When I was young, I somehow connected the idea of being creative with the ability to draw. And of course, I had an older brother who could draw whatever he saw. Sadly, my drawing ability consisted of stick figures and doodles. So I grew up thinking I wasn’t creative because I couldn’t draw.
Academics became my niche and doing well in school became my idol. Grew up, got married, had kids and now I have five children that all have different niches than I. Surprise! So now I’m beginning to look at creativity in a whole new light. Is it how I arrange flowers? It it in a number of different article ideas? Currently, my definition of creativity is taking what you have on hand and making it into something else. It can be an answer to a solution or it can be a work of art or it can be both.
I want to encourage my kids to be creative and think creatively. How do you encourage your kids to be creative? Or are most kids naturally creative and by the time they grow up, it’s squeezed out of them? Let me know what you think.
Photo courtesy of iHanna’s photostream (Creative Commons)
Posted in Creativity, Encouragement, Parenting |
By Jan Udlock on July 23, 2010
Jealousy can be such an ugly feeling. I’ve spent too much of my life being jealous over a variety of people and situations. What I’ve come to recently realize is when I feel jealous of someone, there is something in my life that I’m not happy with. Are they doing something that I want to be doing? Are they accomplishing some goal that I actually want to accomplish. Are they taking positive steps towards some experience? What are they risking?
So my answer today for me is to take the step. What about you? Who are you jealous of and how can you change your situation?
Photo courtesy of Look Into My Eyes (Creative Commons)
Posted in Encouragement, Jealousy, Letting go |
By Jan Udlock on June 19, 2010
One of the prizes of the 2010 Blogathon was a one hour phone conversation with Marla Beck, Life Coach to Writers and guess what? I was thrilled to win and spent an enlightening time with her. In the beginning of our conversation she asked me if she sprinkled magic fairy dust on me (paraphrased) and suddenly I’d have sterling confidence as a writer, what would my life look like? P A U S E….Hmmm? Well, my life would look different because I wouldn’t be scared to try things. Is that a question or is it a statement? I would query more magazines and let rejections roll off my back. I’d keep trying because I’d view silence from editors as silence; nothing more.
This idea has huge ramifications because it helped me identify what am I not doing because of fear? Intimidation? What do I really want to do?
What would your life look like if you were given a blank check of confidence and strength to be and do anything you knew you could? Anything? How would your life be different?
Photo courtesy of bronwyn (ECG) (Creative Commons)
Posted in Blogathon, Encouragement, Writing | Tagged confidence, Marla Beck |
