When my kids were younger, I would have thoughts that when they got older, life would be easier. And now that they are older, it’s not easier, just different.
Parenting adult children takes a lot of tongue biting and asking questions about what they think. When my children were younger, I could direct them more and what I said was basically law. Now, that my oldest two are on the brink of leaving home, I listen more. In some ways, it takes more emotional energy because sometimes I have to think about each of my responses. I can’t tell them what to do. They have to figure out what they believe and why do they believe it.
It’s hard as a parent to see them struggle with an area in their life. But in the long run, I want it to be their victory rather than mine.
Photo courtesy of normanack (Creative Commons)
My mother in law said that when the kids are little it takes more physical energy and when they get bigger it takes more emotional energy.
As my kids are almost 7 and 8, I can see that shift starting. They can do so much for themselves now, but what I say and my responses are becoming more and more important. I can hear and see them actually starting to apply my "words of wisdom".
So wise…my older boys–one is already an adult, another is almost there…have gotten themselves into scrapes that I know they must get themselves out of, but the worry it has caused me has knocked the breath out of me…I can't fix it for them…but I can't stop worrying about them either.